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A side note of sissyness

Monday, March 28, 2011





Looking at the majestic architecture of the ancient Colleseum in Rome and the magnificent cluster that is the Acropolis on the small screen of my computer, I am engulfed by awe...



What was it like then, when their streets were bustling with people, traders, women and children? Warriors preparing to fight the battle to live, philosophers preaching to their proteges of science, human psycology and the gods? What was it like to be at the junction of civilization?



I have read numerous historical books and delved deeper through fictions and films. Still I thirst for something more. Untagible things that I could not begin to verbalize, that currently resides in that particular hollow spot in the depths of my heart. Reading and absorbing it all will never end, but I fear that I would not ever be whole... so many what ifs and if onlys...



If one day, I would be so lucky, so lucky that by god's permission, should I ever land myself in places historical as those -- Colleseum, Acropolis, Stonhenge, the Rapa Nui & Moai statues of Easter Island -- I will most probably start shaking and within seconds cry my eyes out.



I know, not exactly the conventional reaction of a tourist, but then again, nothing about these places are conventional.



I will weep for those who didn't have it as easy as us, for those who lived their lives to the fullest, and for the people who lived & died upholding causes for the future. I am happy to report to you (via god) that all that you have fought for has been greatly achieved by us, some even beyond any degree of imagination, and I am also sorry that all that you have tirelessly worked for is crumbling one by one due to greed, ignorant and irresponsible acts of your decendants.



Perhaps then, I will heave this unexplained burn in my chest.

2 comments:

maddy said...

els,
at the mo, aku tengah mengulit buku2 sejarah peperangan tentera islam an these two names : Sultan Muhammad Al fateh & Salehudin Al-ayubi are by far the greatest muslim war heroes!Just to share with you, buku tulisan muhammad syaari abdul rahman tajuknya kuasa kepemimpinan al fateh..:). buku yang menarik!

azyze said...

Salehudin Al-Ayubi is very famous for his leadership skills kan...
it's amazing how these people can do so much and change major courses of history with so little (compared to apa yg kita ada sekarang),kan? I wonder how these 'chosen ones' akan memerintah dunia / lead a civilization kalau di dunia sekarang... and how our politicians (note that I do not say leaders because they're scarce nowadays) will fare if they were catapulted back into the past...


thanks for sharing, mad. nanti aku pi cari :)