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Mindsay Memories: Confessions

Saturday, July 31, 2004

aiiyoh, why so many people like to ask weird questions?
nak jawab satu hal pulak...
and no, i'm not mental!! (i think)

I am not religious but have morals.
I am impulsive.
I liked Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind
I am not really good at History but love em
I enjoy taking pictures.
I like spending money on myself.
I like spending money on others.
I pay my own bills.
I rely on my parents for money (when my scholarship $$ habis)
I can cook.
I don't like clutter but i'm kinda messy.
I have heard of Blonde Redhead.
People tell me I have an odd taste.
I excel academically (so far...)
I am told I have yet to fulfill my potential.
I couldn't do sports to save my life.
I am creative (or so i would like to think)
I am artistically inclined.
I have shoplifted.
i can dance, but ppl think i probably dance like a cardboard gorilla.
I can sing.
I can swim.
I enjoy surveys when I'm bored.
I keep a journal.
I enjoy controversy.
I can be a bitch
I have a thing for bad boys
I'm not sure if I'll get married.
People enjoy talking to me (well they say they do)
I annoy people from time to time.
I've snuck out of the house (mandi sungai, wohoo!!)
I don't think Sarah Jessica Parker is pretty.
I hate people who pretend to be suicidal.
I will never be photogenic
I think graffiti is art.
I have cheated on someone.
I like playgrounds.
I dance in the rain.
My favourite color is black.
I am musically inclined.
I like listening to music.
i've never tried wearing a thong
I have siblings
My siblings annoy me

Mindsay Memories : Yes, I am that bored

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Would you rather be an African elephant or an Asian elephant? Why?
Any. trampling is fun!!

Would you rather freeze to death or burn alive? Why?
Freeze... some ppl frozen for years still lives.. (oh wait, it says 'to death'. Damn.)

Name three movies you like:
The matrix triology, i am sam, my best friend's wedding

Name three books you like:
3wishes, the vampire lestat, red dragon

Have you ever fallen in love with a fictional character? Which one(s)? Why?
lestat- so much mystery, such sad soul, such passion

Republican, Democrat or other? Why?
not political

Attendance percentage at high school dances?
Don't have that much kan? terawikh puasa/solat hajat exam boleh?

What television shows do you watch regularly?
csi, currently AF (a sucker for reality shows)

Abortion is...
killing!

The death penalty is...
fair for those who deserve it

How do you take your coffee?
2gula 1kopi

How do you take your tea?
dua gula satu uncang

Who's your favorite teacher/professor?
ms.j... and en.rahmat!!

How do you feel about your parents?
love em to bits!!

What sort of music do you listen to?
swing, jazz, r&b, top 40 too

List five or ten bands you listen to.
bands? aerosmith, the darkness, g&r, oasis, the rat pack, platters, gigi, padi, coldplay,barenaked ladies

Do you use public transportation?
yup!!

Ever told someone you love him/her?
family members, yeah. that person? nowpe..i'm a chickenshit...

Morning person, night person or both?
not morning person la.. but daytime person...night only when there's something on. then i'm adrenaline filled!

Siblings?
am the eldest of four

What are your friends like?
funny, understanding, wacko just like me

Amusement parks are?
full of serial killers on the loose!

Cafeterias are?
now plagued with banglas who goes 'nasi guring, sapa order nasi guring!"

Dogs are?
furry??

Any phobias, traumas or other weirdnesses?
claustrophobic...


Mindsay Memories : Hani & Me

I met Hani last saturday night. it's been such a long time since I last saw her. It's been what, like, two years? shish..

It's my fault actually. On her last day here, before she went abroad for her degree, I wasn't around. I was in shah alam. I could've work something out, bribe my friend to drive me to the airport or something, but I was to lazy to move my huge ass from the college. (it's a two hour ride la!). So that was that. She came back last year for her summer holidays - that's 3 months- and still we didn't meet up. The new semester just started, and I was just too busy studying/ doing class projects/ events/ study group/ blablablablabla. Yhree f****ng months and I couldn't spend even half a day with an old friend, which, I do miss when she's not around. A day before she left for the u.k again, she called me up and told me that she just got into an accident but she was ok. I was concerned, but still, I didn't go and see her. Was at home (and her house is just 10 minutes ride from mine), but since she said she was okay, and I have go to shah alam for my radio job in two hours, I just thank god for keeping her safe...that was it. Such a good friend I am, huh?

It was only later that I knew the whole deal about the accident. The car was a goner. It was a twitsted piece of shit. Everybody thought that the driver was definately dead. I later talked to Hani on the phone and she said that it was such a miracle that she was still alive. All she remembered was that she locked the car as usual, put on the air cond, was speeding and at the same time trying to find her phone in her bag. In just seconds, the car did a doulble turn, banged a tree and there was darkness. The second time she opened her eyes, she saw this white space; just pure bright white light with a star in the middle of the shine. Then she closed her eyes, and the next thing she knows, she was already standing beside the wreck, and people were already around her. Nobody could believe that she was the driver. There was no way she could've crawl out coz all doors were locked and the windows were up. They even had to smash the front screen to get her purse and handphone. Everyone was talking at the same time. All she could think about was the car, and her family. As soon as her father arived they took her to the hospital, and miriculously she didn't suffer from any serious injury. A few bruises and a small cut at her ankle. That was all. She told me she didn't want me to worry about her.

She went through all that trauma and I wasn't there for her. She was scared to death, and I wasn't there to calm her fears, to hold her, to tell her that everything's gonna be alright. I wasn't there...

I nearly cried at the sight of her on Sat night. She's slimmer, and she looked wonderful! She was as chirpy as ever, talking non stop about her life abroad, how she's coping. Throughout dinner, I so wanted to tell her how sorry I was, and how I wanted to apologize to her for not being there for her in her time of need, but it got stuck in my throat. I knew I was going to cry if I start talking about that, and plus, she hates tears. She's the kind that hates when it rains coz according to her, the world's so gloomy, and loves the sun, even when it's slowly baking all of us crispy...and black.

so I just kept it all inside. I smiled throughout, and did the usual gossip-omg-chick talk with her. We only had two hours as she had to be home by 11. By 1130 I was already at home, on my bed, unwrapping her gift to me. It was a really cool baby blue sweater, and it must've cost her quite some pounds.

It was so beautiful I cried. This is the friend that didn't care about the wrongs I've done, who still sees me as her funny-bengong- carefree buddy, who doesn't give two hoots if
i last minute cancelled my meetings with her, who doesn't mind talking on the phone long-distance for hours (imagine her bills! u.k -malaysia), who sends the sweetest cards for my birthdays, who doesn't mind and still loves to do the snailmail wimme becoz it's more personal and closer that pouring her heart out on the pooter. I can't see any of my current friends doing that for me, if I've done them wrong. They'd be "outta my life, jerk!" faster than you can say 'imma dickhead'.

The value of a friendship has never been this clear to me. I had a very bad experience with a best-friend a long time ago, and I decided that I don't want another, save me from any more heartache. But after meeting hani, maybe it's time to reconsider, coz she sure is a heck o a friend!!

Hani, if you ever read this, love you lots!~!!

Mindsay Memories : A Message For Pole

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

hey pole
been long since i talked with you. hope you're doing fine.
you know the old age debate about pr vs. advert that's been going on in the faculty? how some advertising students (not you) would snicker when they walk pass us Public Relations students at the cafe? or how some pr students would thinks that the world would be a better place without snotty advert people?
well, that's crap. i mean, you and i go along fine, aiight?

i understand that we each have our own perceptions. even ms.monica and dr.ngu can't get along when it comes to that issue. we all have our patriotic streak in us. but no sweat la. we're still friends even though we have our differences, kan? as long as that is true, i'm fine.

hey, i kinda miss you la Le. it's been such a long time. you advert guyz are aways busy. i run around doing events and press conferences and stuff too, but somehow even in the middle of the night you guyz would be doing some kinda brainstorming or storyboard or something. i think i need a dose of roald dahl from you dude..

So how come we were never close during our dip? but then again, i was not really that close to a lot of people. looking back, i kinda regret not spending time to get to know y'all. i feel that the bond between us classmates would've been stronger if i were to get to know you guyz better. it took me three years to know that you hated popcorn during movies. now that's a long time...
when we started really talking to each other on the last semester, i was kinda glad coz i felt as if i've somehow lessen the gap with another classmate of mine. i mean, back then the friends i kinda revolved around were nadh, marlia, zairul, jozi, maria, er, who else? oh, liza panjang for a while. with the others, it was just in the standard chat in the class. i think it's safe to say that i created no enemy back then. of course there are times when i must've hurt someone's feelings, but that's inevitable. my mouth can do unimaginable damage to one's soul, but they're never permanent. i'd say they're like dem invincible ink stuff. now you see it now you dont. i can only hope that nobody holds any grudge against me. there are times when i feel like slapping sommma dem senseless, but i cool down kinda fast. err.. have you felt like slapping my face senseless? would be great if you could tell me. i won't take offence. just good to know where i screwed up and hopefully not do the same mistakes again.

neways, this is geting too long, so i'll stop here. hope to hear from you soon Pole!

Mindsay Memories : another one swept off her feet...

Update: Nama kawan saya terpaksa diubah kerana keluarga beliau berada dalam bidang hiburan dan, well, saya tak mahu pendapat peribadi saya pada masa lalu menjadi bahan ratahan media.

She's now happily married to the guy mentioned in this post. They have 3 beautiful kids and they're enjoying great sucess in the entertainment industry. Yang lepas itu lepas, dan kita doakan yang terbaik untuk masa hadapan.

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I was on my way back from a theatre show two days ago when I recieved a text about my friend's marriage. "Lolita is getting married this friday".

Lolita? Out of all the people I know, Lolita?
I was never close to Lolita, but we were okay. I mean, if you see each other's face everyday at class, sooner or later you'd start to know each other a little bit, right? We were in the same batch during our diploma days, but different classes though.( of course, the lecturing system is kinda different in Malaysia. instead of going to different lecture halls, we have teachers coming into our classes/halls to lecture, so students are randomly devided into group/classes). Now that we're doing degree our in the same class, I've gotten to know her better.

The thing is, this guy Lolita's marrying was her ex (or a jerk of an ex, if i may say). They have been on and off for quite a while. I remember last semester when they had a fight (and a break off), she was so miserable! I wasn't close to her, so I donno what really happened, but I think everyone knew about it. She skipped classes, we didn't see her for quite a while, and she had an accident. She came back to class with bruises. It took her quite some time to recover from her heartbreak. As an observer, and a so-so friend, I felt really sorry for her, and was happy to finally see her back on track. She adopted this positive outlook on life, and kinda put the past behind her.

The bf I've known since dip times too, and we did chat and stuff. he's kinda funny and all, but people said that he's a creep when it comes to relationship. I didnt believe that at first, but after what happened to Lolita, i think i should give my friends the benefit of the doubt.

So suddenly there's this text about them getting together. What happened? everyone was immediately calling everyone else asking if they knew anything about it. Yesterday Lolita sent an email to the class. (we're all doing our internship period for 5 months so it's kinda hard to gather all of us). She didn't really tell us what happened, but is all excited and says that she knows this is her destiny, and she's really happy and hoped that we're happy for her as well.
heck, maybe they really are in love, maybe they've mend all the broken pieces and are willing to put their differences behind and commit to each other...
Who am I to say, right? besides, marriage is a big, serious thing. we're all not Britney...

Still, it does seems kinda weird that out of the blue a classmate of mine is getting married. And it's gonna be even weirder when we'll be addressing her as Mrs.Lolita.

Her soon to be status got me thinking last week and i just realized that everyone is doing the 'thang'- Lolita getting married, and another friend of mine planning to have a skydiving marriage thingy for her wedding with her australian boyfriend and all. This twin cousins of mine have decided to apply for PR status in Australia so i guess the next time we see each other we'd be exchanging wrinkle-free tips.

I'm years behind. y'all are doing the 'adult' stuff, while I'm still wearing jeans and sneakers to work. by the time I actually live with the fact that cleanse, tone and moisturize is the sacred way to good skin, they'd already be parents to tweens! Shit, I'm in deep crap...

Mindsay Memories : How it all started

Friday, July 16, 2004

the crapping - introduction
The first thing that came to my mind when i woke up this morning: blogs. Out of all the things on earth, blogs. Why?
I have no friggin' idea. But it stayed with me for so long it was like a prophecy or something (yeah, right). So i thought 'what the heck' and decided to have me own blog.

Am i ready for this?
Am i sure that i would want to tell the world about myself?
Will i still have time to immerse myself with Lestat and the tales of the darkworld?

Well, hell yeah!

So here's to crapping, emo-postings and more crapping!!
Cheers